Notes on Oscar

No surprise that No Country won best picture. All my friends liked it more than me. That means it is the winner for sure. What was up with that little Coen brother? Is he a half wit or something? He could only mutter thank you. He looked like he didn't want to be there. He has the very large star quality head on a tiny frame like Morgan Fairchild. He wasn't very Minnesota nice and should remember that the millions he rakes in come from the decrepit old Satan based machinery that is Hollywood. He better bow to the master a bit more graciously. Oh, that's right, Jack Valenti was in the dead people slide show, maybe the veil of evil has been lifted. I think Frances McDormand aka Frannie Coen pissed herself in the audience she was so proud of her hubbie. Is it the tall one or the half wit?
Daniel Day-Lewis looked like the bride of a pirate. What was up with the hoop earings? Yikes. The hair looked as if he had it styled right here in Wisconsin at the local beauty salon ready for a night out on the town for some country line dancing. Strange.
Maybe next year the Oscars should drop award for best song. I hit the mute on every song and worked on the NY Times crossword. The big production numbers made me think it was 1973 or something again. The whole show had that old sort of feeling to it in a badly written way. The writer strike must have left them rusty. Though, I dig John Stewart and when he had the Check Chick who won for best song come out and finish her speech that was nice. He is a good guy.
I wish I would have been Forrest Whitaker. Lucky guy. Had to support and hug and hold up shaky trembling beautiful french Marion Cotillard. That was the best win of the night that had me squeal with delight. A big surprise and I think she really deserved it for La Vie En Rose. When they got back stage they went at hugging each other again. Poor weepy creature in your fish scale Gaultier dress. So french! You know Forrest was packing wood.
I think Tilda Swinton must be pretty groovy in an artsy fartsy way. She mentioned asses and nipples in her speech.
The biggest surprise of the night was I never would have thought I might have the opportunity to see Diablo Cody flash her cooch on the stage. Honey! Was that "dress" your former lounging lingerie back from your stripper days? She had all she could do to keep that cut to the crotch thing together as she walked around the stage. Nice tattoo too. Gadzooks woman! Go get yerself to the laser doctor and get that mess off your arm. You are playing with the big boys now.
Most all the winners were foreigners, a sure sign of the downfall of America.